Sunday, January 22, 2012

One Shake at a Time Pt. II Day 11 - Call Me Crazy

I'll be you can't guess what's in the "Move" jar!
Hey - Call Me Bwana! So guess what. Yep you guessed it I start back on the cleanse tomorrow because I've realized that for some reason my pain is back and it doesn't matter if I'm cleansing or not. Plus there's also a chance that by cleansing I will beat the pain back and eventually be able to drop the pain meds altogether. Given the events of the last 3 years that all seems pretty pie in the sky but as I've said I'm willing to try anything except gay sex to get rid of this and who know if it's the right guy, there some nice relaxing music on the the stereo Not going there. Sorry fellas I know I'm disappointing a lot of my really close guy friends but geez guys you know all these pain meds really make guys even more unattractive than they are when I'm just boozin' along like a wacky spankity ass sailor.

So basically I'm gonna take up where I left off and I'm not gonna whine because I've had just as much pain, today especially, on the Schwarzenegger Eliminator diet as I was having on the cleanse. Also I have to say after 3 weeks of cleansing my lovely Hollyberry is one slender sexy little cajun thang so much so that I'm having trouble keepin the pup in the pound, or the old horse in the corral, the train in the station, the trouser snake in his cave...whatever the proper metaphor is. Also now that football season is officially over this shouldn't be a big deal cuz all my friends won't be inviting us over for beer, chips, dip, and heroin. To tell you the truth I watched one game two games all season, today and the Ravens game, both of which we lost, which tells you why I didn't watch more games because I am clearly a jinx.

Get your hands on some of this stuff before it's illegal.

So I know y'all are just so tickled you could puke, now that I'm going back on the cleanse and I can blog on my progress every day, keep a running tally as those pounds melt away and the gargantuan growth between my boobies and my belt buckle goes away. How about those boobies anyway. What does an old fart have to do to get rid of his man boobs? There pretty big if any of you gals out there would like to buy 'em off me. I'll send you a pic and then maybe you'll wanna come over and take 'em for a test drive!

I'll be peein' like a 12 year-old before you know it!

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